My personal fight
Mostly with my self – but non the less fighting.
Some of you know me and for some it’s a new acquaintance.
About 4 years ago I was weighing at around 150 to 160(+) kilograms.
I was basically heavy ever since I can remember myself, and the only “memory” of myself not heavy is not even a real memory but it was inputted into my head via from photos from my childhood.
I was growing up as a heavy kid, heavy teenager and turned out to be a heavy young adult.
Though a major credit goes to my surroundings – my family and friends – who made it easier for me, for better or for worse.
The thing is, that even today, 4.5 years after starting my process, I can’t say I’m “not fat”.
Even though I’m not nearly what I used to be (and never will), I’m still finding myself fighting day in day out with the old me.
Even though I have changed my ways, if it’s (trying to) eating less bad stuff, or running after work or cycling for a few dozen Km on the weekend – i still don’t always feel good with my self.
The reason I’m writing this is quite silly actually:) today I went to buy new pants.
And as I live in China, and Chinese are a “little” smaller than me, I found myself trying on a bunch of different pairs, but the slim fit was a little too slim for me.
So it’s funny, that after everything I did, I still found myself with a problem of buying a stupid pair of pants (obviously I could have bought, but I didn’t really like the ones that fit me).
Good thing I’m going home for a vacation soon;)